Netball – The World’s Most Pointless Sport?

Say what you like about Ultimate Frisbee, but there’s no denying that it is unique. It may not count as a sport if you play rugby or football, but there is no other team game out there which is played with a Frisbee. Netball, however, has a vastly superior and far cooler older brother called basketball, of which everyone in the world is aware, and yet it seems to evade the ridicule reserved for poor old Ultimate Frisbee. I mean, obviously you’re asking for it if you stick the word ‘Ultimate’ in your sport’s name (a sport which, let’s not forget, is lacking the most vital ingredient in any team sport – namely a ball) and expect not to be the laughingstock of the entire sporting world, but then again, it’s completely original and at least it has people doing fucking cool dives (tiny.cc/jtz76) from time to time.

 

 

Yeah, have fun pivoting on one foot and not being allowed to shoot once you receive this ball.

 

But what’s good about netball, apart from fuck all? Literally fuck all. Well, that’s not strictly true, only everything that is good about it comes from basketball. Netball is just basketball with the fun bits taken out of it. You can’t run with the ball, you have needlessly confusing zones that you’re mostly not allowed in, and only two people on the team are allowed to shoot. And that’s only from inside the D, which is tiny, and they can’t slam-dunk it! So the three things you go to watch basketball for, i.e. mad dribbling skillz [sic], outrageous slam dunks, and crazy three point shots at the buzzer, are all out of the question. Just why!? And just to add insult to injury, you have to stand a metre away from the person on the ball or something stupid, so there is literally nothing you can do to stop someone scoring a basket/goal/net(?) if they’ve practiced their technique enough. You just have to stand there and watch as they throw it over your head. It’s like some fucking sadistic game of piggy in the middle, except not nearly as fun because nobody’s getting bullied.

 

Netball? Or... this?

 

But what really irritates me about netball is how sexist it is. Everything about it smacks of a game the Victorians made up after basketball was invented that would be suitable for those poor dainty women, too delicate to play a rough, brutish man’s game like basketball. And yet even after the Suffragette movement, the sixties, a female Prime Minister and all that, women still get foisted off with crappy old netball. Why aren’t the feminists demanding that it gets abolished? It’s an affront to women everywhere that netball remains far more popular than basketball in England despite being quite evidently utter shite in comparison. Every time you as a woman play netball, you are effectively saying, ‘Oh yes, those Victorians were right, I am far too fragile to play a man’s game like basketball, even if a four year-old could probably mathematically prove that basketball is more fun on a fucking abacus.’ While you’re at it, why not just campaign for disenfranchisement and a further increase in the male/female pay gap?

 

Yeah, sorry Emily Davison, thanks for dying for the women's cause and everything but actually we'd rather just play netball

 

And I know men play it too, but I don’t even know where to put this on the feminist map, all I know is that it’s fucking stupid. Anytime a group of people play netball on what is essentially a basketball court without the backboards, they might as well be going down a pristine ski-slope in high heels. I’m sorry but I cannot comprehend how a vastly superior version of netball is right there, readily available, and yet people continue to play a pointless, watered-down version of it. Jerry Seinfeld said it best, even if he was talking about canned fruit, when he said ‘Why would anybody eat it? I mean, can anybody answer that? I can see the can if you’re in the army, but fresh fruit is there! It’s available! It’s two aisles over!’

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    • Eleanor
    • June 14th, 2012

    You utter moron. If you watch Netball being played at international level, you will shut your little whiny mouth and never say a bad word about the sport again. You say it is sexist, yet it is one of the only female dominated sports on the planet. And comparing it to Basketball is stupid, the WNBA is not nearly as big as the NBA, it even needs a W in front of it so people don’t accidentally watch the wrong gender. Why is NBA not called MNBA, so people know it is played by men? Talk about sexist. And those rules are in place so people know it’s a different game. Agreed Netball was derived from Basketball, but it’s like saying why bother swimming breaststroke when front crawl is a far more efficient, faster way of swimming?

      • Joe Blow
      • October 19th, 2012

      The fact remains it is such a stupid game with stupid rules – the whistle blows more than Australian Rules Football (which is another ridiculous game). I grew up watching my sister playing it and having to play mixed netball for high school phys-ed.

      The amount of “contact” calls made, stupid zone violations and the general amount of senseless rules make this a sport to avoid. I don’t see any sexist debate with it but with the sport itself. Whether men, women or both play it – it wont change the fact that it is one of the lamest sports in the world!

        • Lisa
        • July 10th, 2013

        This is not a lame sport football is BORING also netball is very hard to play than run with a ball in your arms to get a touch down whatever LAME so i think netball is a great sport and that is my opinion and btw i play netball and its harder than you think and more skill. So it ain’t a lame sport that is what i think of netball and I’m in one of the grand finals and it is hard to get up there and it not like other sports ow in basket ball you dribble and in netball you pivot and shoot also i would think it has more skill to shoot in netball because in basketball there is a backboard and if you miss it will bounce in the basket but with netball you need more skill to get it in the hoop and netball is not a LAME sport so that is my opinion

      • I couldn’t agree more.

      • Peter
      • March 4th, 2014

      Lol Eleanor its only female dominated because men aren’t allowed to play in the women’s leagues. If they were there would be 0 women in the game haha because men are better than women at every sport that was ever invented or ever will be invented

        • Leah
        • July 8th, 2014

        Not better, rougher there’s a difference buddy!

        • Lolololololl
        • September 15th, 2016

        Really Peter? ‘It’s only women dominated because men aren’t aloud to play in women’s league’ No s**t Sherlock. Why do you think it’s called a women league??? Netball has men and women’s league just like any other sport and its international. Men’s league aren’t as heard of just because a lot of men don’t play netball.

        • Lolololololl
        • September 15th, 2016

        Really Peter ‘it’s only women dominated because men aren’t aloud to play in women’s league’ no s**t Sherlock why do you think it’s called a WOMENS LEAGUE. Netball has men and women league just like any other sport. YES there is such thing as men playing netball it’s not like men can’t play.

        • Catherine
        • November 8th, 2016

        Netball is female dominated because men aren’t allowed to play in the women’s league the same way that basketball is male dominated because women aren’t allowed to play in the men’s league.

        My brother is super sporty and great at all sports but when he played netball he sucked. It is a hard sport and requires skill, just because there are less men playing it and they aren’t necessarily good at it doesn’t make it a stupid sport.

        You can claim that all sports have stupid or pointless rules but that doesn’t mean that people can’t or shouldn’t be able to play that sport. You can easily say that rugby is pointless but that doesn’t mean that people don’t like it or follow it.

        • Aimee Robinson
        • March 17th, 2017

        That’s not true there are some women that are a lot better at men at sports even football.

    • Yes, it’s one of the only female dominated sports on the planet – for all the wrong reasons. I just think it’s a shame that girls are encouraged to play a watered-down version of a ‘male’ sport which they are perfectly capable of playing themselves. Still. In the 21st century. Of COURSE international netball players are good – the level is incredibly high, I’m sure. But if girls weren’t pushed in schools across the country into playing basketball-lite because it’s more ‘suitable’ for them, then those same international netball players would be achieving similar levels of excellence in a more challenging and interesting sport.

      • rip
      • April 19th, 2017

      heh triggered

    • Jake Batman
    • March 11th, 2013

    It is not a sport!

      • Jessica
      • July 10th, 2013

      Netball is a sport so is basketball

    • rangzii
    • July 25th, 2013

    Rather than writing hate about a sport, how about you get off your arse and do something worthwhile. You have to be surprisingly fit to play netball, and I’d love to see you play.

    • I’ve played. It’s fine, it’s quite good fun. But basketball is better.

    • Reuben
    • April 28th, 2014

    I have nothing against women playing sport but theres a reason why sport in general links to men specifically. Men are designed for harder physical tasks. We are naturally stronger and more athletic and yeah you could say we are cocky about it too. Its just how it is and it isn’t sexist. We are just dominant in that area. If you think its sexist then blame God for making the male race stronger and athletic.

    Netball is very similar to basketball. The only thing is netball seems to take away things from basketball like dribbling, having a backboard, no 3point shots, no free throws, no dunks, no alley oops, no jump shots or and ones!. Its basically a stripped down version of basketball with rules that make the game playable without the things basketball have. You could say netball is the opposite of a pimped out version of basketball. For example netball=pizza with no topping
    Basketball=pizza with the works
    In saying all this chicks like simple and men like extreme. Some chicks like extreme but only the ones who dont complain about breaking a nail. Anyways thankyou for reading my paragraph.

      • emms
      • April 9th, 2015

      Get a life and find something to do!

    • Tom Cutler
    • May 19th, 2014

    I have to agree that netball has some stupid rules and I’m not sure if it’s bad referring but, if I get around a player, we catch it at the same time, the only thing I touch is the ball and I get penalised I’m sorry it’s a stupid sport. It’s way too easy and the only difficult aspect is avoiding the 10000 stupid penalties. Not to mention I have still have no idea what rule I break if do dunk or alley-oop the ball.

      • emms
      • April 12th, 2015

      Why can’t people just drop it netball was made becauce boys where being evil and would not let girls play!

    • Why
    • May 21st, 2014

    Actually, my netball team play basketball too. But there are not many girls basketball leagues around, and in schools we are taught netball over basketball.

    • Yes, this was exactly my point. Girls are taught netball over basketball in school because of outdated Victorian notions that it is more suitable for their poor, delicate female frames, when obviously they are more than capable of playing basketball, which is an all round better sport. It’s not really netball’s fault – it’s a perfectly fun game, it’s just basketball-lite. And why play basketball-lite when you can play the real thing?

      Like you say, there are not many girls basketball leagues around. But there should be! And if we could move past our old-fashioned mindset of encouraging girls to play watered-down versions of ‘proper’ sports, there would be.

        • emms
        • April 9th, 2015

        What are you trying to say about girls??

    • Izzy
    • July 21st, 2014

    You have obviously never seen a proper match … I am a highly level player and trust me there is nothing dainty about netball. I have had a broken nose two chipped teeth and four broken fingers. Netball us a tactical thought with many underlying principals : such as special awerness with markings players and team mates, team work , speed stamina agility and elevation.

      • Luke
      • April 18th, 2016

      Your grammar isn’t ‘highly level.’

    • Izzy
    • July 21st, 2014

    Also women have no major sports left.. Rugby was originally a mans sport same with football and now men our email with women in hockey at least let women keep some originality and heritage my great grandma played ffs.

  1. Netball is popular amongst women (especially feminists) because it’s one of the few sports that they can dominate. They own the sport. It’s hugely popular where I live.

    Yes the blatant sexism pisses me off, but not in the way you think. Most netball teams will claim to be open to all. There’s no rule that says that only women can play. But the whole thing is setup to outright discourage anyone other than fit, well proportioned women from playing it.

    Most teams play in bodysuits which are nothing more than super tight, ultra feminised dresses. They want to keep the sport female only.

    Anyone should be free to play any sport they want and in most cases that is true, even with traditionally female sports like (field) hockey. But netball and the netball culture is massively sexist and no one calls them out on it.

    If a football or basketball club tried to block women from playing there would be outrage. But netball gets a free pass.

    • Ohare
    • August 3rd, 2014

    I have been following the commonwealth games….It sure looks like it could get a tad physical. Also basketball has some stupid rules, especially about dribbling

  2. I just saw this sport on a delayed broadcast of the Commnwealth Games in the U.S., and I have to say that my first (and second) reaction was: “WTF, why not just play basketball?” My third reaction was, “what are they blowing that whistle for now?”

    I must say that, coming from the States where women play basketball at every level from elementary school to the pros with no notable ill effects, this netball does look quite bizarre, even funny. It really looks like just what the author describes: a game designed to “save” women from the manly vicissitudes of actual basketball, and like basketball with all of the actual interesting and athletic parts removed. Now

    I have no doubt that the women who play netball are athletic and skilled, but wouldn’t they be equally good at a more global, more interesting, more athletic, and more skill-testing game like basketball?

    • Bernadette
    • September 1st, 2014

    I am a long-time netballer and absolutely agree that a person unfamiliar with the sport would find it confusing and that it would seem that the whistle is being blown by the umpire far too much.

    There are a lot of rules that players have to abide by making it a highly technical sport, which is partly what makes it so interesting to play. You have to be thinking the whole time in order to play this sport well. You can’t just be a “natural” at ball skills, have great hand-eye coordination, or be particularly fast and agile. You have to be able to think and see the strategy in the game.

    Netball is also probably the truest team sport. One or two dominant players can’t win the game for you because of the zoning, because you can’t move once you have the ball in hand, because you have only three seconds to get rid of the ball once you’ve caught it, because only two people are allowed to shoot.

    I have played both netball and basketball and there is no doubt in my mind that both are equally as demanding physically. The notion that netball is pushed onto girls because it is somehow physically easier is just rot. The modern version of netball is in fact very physical, not the non-contact sport that it was in the past.

    I can see where some people are coming from with the sexism thing. The rules of netball do state that it is a single-sex sport. They do not specify that it is a women’s only sport. I think the reason boys/men don’t play is because they perceive it to be a women’s sport. But some associations do encourage boys. I coach a team for my local primary school and I have two boys in my team. I have also played against mixed-sex teams (and not in a specifically mixed-sex competition).

    Some thoughts…….

    • Lucy
    • October 12th, 2014

    If you ever watch netball playing played at any lever whether it’s school,leauge,or national you will see how hard it is. I bet you’ve never even tried it you can just shut up

    • Darren
    • December 23rd, 2014

    If the US could take that burger away from it’s face for a mo & read the original rules of Basketball then it would realise that the physical movements & tactics involved in Netball are more representative of the original game of Basketball than anything else.. including current day Basketball. Basketball was invented by a British subject not a “Canadian American”. Jeez there’s a lot of whitewashing going on.

    • philohio
    • March 26th, 2015

    Frisbee is just a flat ball.

  3. Are you kidding netball is an amazing sport that you need allot of skill for.if you hate netball you are just a B;?CH !!!

  4. Bunk :
    I couldn’t agree more.

    You are just a doof bag if you think netball is a sexist easy game cuz it is not.it requires more skill than basketball

    • endstone
    • August 7th, 2015

    i saw a bunch of guys playing this once. a basketball player asked if he could join and they let him. when one of the netballers was taking his precious time lining up one of those stupid uncontested layup shots the basketball player decided to reject the ball with an emphatic, “get that weak shit out of here.” all the netballers started crying. yes. they were literally crying right there on the court. grown men crying to the ref like a child crying to their mommy.

    tells u all u need to know about the little weaklings that play this sport. netball = a sport for sissies.

    • David
    • August 7th, 2015

    Netball is a weak sport at best. I’ve seen excellent Netball players attempt to transition their Netball skills and fitness to basketball; the results are always disappointing.

    As a basketball player at times I would shot 3 pointers into Netball hops for practice because it create a more difficult target – this was no problem. The Netball rims would be left up after their practice so might as well test my shooting ability. Which begs me to question why do shot from so close with a very simple basic technique – this would not take long to master with a light netball ball. It is comparable to a basketball shooting technique some what.

    I can’t imagine a Netball player transitioning well (quickly) into any challenging team based sport, football, basketball, rugby i.e i’m sure if a decent football/basketball player switched to netball they would adjust to the skills and match the fitness much quicker then the other way round.

    The worst thing about netball is that fact you have yo let a player shoot while waving your hand in their face as if to distract them. Seriously can somebody explain this, why wouldn’t you just block the shot take, forcefully take it out their hand.

    It really does seem it was made for people that are capable enough to play basketball.

    • jj
    • August 30th, 2015

    k den

    • C bridd
    • September 29th, 2015

    The women need to stop playing such an unskilled and boring game like seriously what is the fun in catching and throwing a ball without contact? The answer is none. They need to stop bitching and moaning about a game which takes no effort and play a real sport for example rugby. Plenty of contact and a fun thing to get involved in and it’s not just for men. Does my head in when I see women breaking a sweat and putting their heart into such a demanding game then you have people who play such a lame game by the name of netball

    • nexxogen
    • October 21st, 2015

    So many people missing the point here. It’s not about watching a proper match, and thinking that shooting the basket without the blackboard is more skillful. It’s about netball being basketball’s retarded little brother. Why do I say this? Simply because you could play basketball like it’s netball, without breaking a single rule of basketball, if you chose to do so! You could just pass the ball without dribbling, stay in your “zone”, not defend properly, and not use the blackboard when shooting. Is someone gonna tell me this isn’t true? What this means is that someone took basketball, removed a whole bunch of stuff, and called it netball. There’s not a single exciting thing that netball has but basketball lacks. Not a single one. On the other hand, if you try doing any of the things that make basketball so exciting in a netball game, you’d be breaking a thousand rules. Playing netball feels like you’re forced to play basketball with your legs and arms tied. It’s ridiculous to even talk about this.

    • The truth
    • December 4th, 2015

    Basketball is superior, netball is trash. Everyone should play basketball instead of netball. No one should play netball, no matter what.

    • Netball sucks
    • February 22nd, 2016

    I agree,netball is absolutely stupid and pointless

    • kim
    • July 8th, 2016

    what is wrong with you people????? netball is such a good sport, you wouldn’t know because you only judge you haven’t been to a game. Maybe netball is so bad for you because only girls play it.

    PS. get a life

    • Sarah
    • September 10th, 2016

    Do you even know the rules to netball?

    • Braedan
    • September 17th, 2016

    i love how all the netballers are saying you haven’t even seen a game that’s y you’re hating but they say stuff like it’s easier to shoot in basketball because of the backboard if you have seen a game of basketball you would know they don’t usaully use the backboard while shooting unless their doing a layup

    • Steph Vella
    • November 10th, 2016

    can I just put it out there that in the text below the photo he says:

    “Yeah, have fun pivoting on one foot and not being allowed to shoot once you receive this ball.”

    Obviously the writer of this article is too stupid to realize that the player who has caught the ball is the Goal Shooter and can shoot the ball!! Shaking my head at how such a blind, arrogant person can write such a terrible article about a sport that they have shown to have poor knowledge of. I’ve played both netball and Basketball, and I enjoy them both equally. They’re two different sports for God’s sake. Netball requires the whole teams efforts to move the ball down the court, not just a couple ball hogs like in some of the basketball games I’ve played.

    • You got me Steph, I definitely didn’t just copy and paste the first image that came up after searching Google Images for “netball”. Such a blind, arrogant person.

    • Mel
    • February 11th, 2017

    Ouch! Talk about bitter and twisted!
    Does it really matter?? If girls (or boys) are having fun whilst being active instead of being glued to a phone or games console then who is anyone to slate such a thing!
    Playing a team sport, whatever it may be is great for so many reasons- teamwork, Fitness, jumping and generally moving around (a problem our children of today seem to have).
    How embarrassing for whoever wrote this article! Obviously another person sitting behind a computer writing pointless things instead of being out there, participating and enjoying! I feel sorry for you. Netball, football, basketball, running, any sport is wayyyyyy better for you in every way than sitting behind a desk typing away and moaning how rubbish and pointless something is. I know what I’d prefer to be doing! ⛹️‍♀️⛹️‍♀️⛹️‍♀️⛹️‍♀️⛹️‍♀️🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀

    • Alex
    • March 18th, 2017

    You’re wrong😂😂😂😂 you try laying netball see how pointless it is. It requires u to have more patience agility and stamina than basketball and it doesn’t matter how sexist or whatever u think people choose netball over bAsketball bcos they enjoy playing it so I don’t see y u are so against that

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